for love not $

It took 96 hours to realize I’m here to shake hands and kiss babies.

I’m such a dork. But a lovable dork.

I met ten hall of famers and told each one a story. I’m sure some would use that as some kind of flex but sadly I don’t remember any of their names and if not for the fact that they were hall of famers I wouldn’t have been asked to talk to them. Strange, sad and true.

Apparently they’re loaded and if we tell the stories just right they’ll give us some of their money. I mean, it worked so it’s not a complete lie but for real for real, the whole game is kinda f’d up.

I’m a behind the scenes person cause being the face isn’t my jam but tonight was like taking a live classroom lesson and for that reason alone was totally worth it. There was a lotta love in the room and I musta been hugged by about fifty strangers who thanked me for doing my job and told me some story they believed related to me personally. That was weird as all fuck to me. Then again, there was a lotta alcohol too.

Is it too late in life to teach elementary school and too foolish to think I can make a living of it cause I’d be an f’n awesome teacher of tiny people.