“where have you been all my life?“

“pretty sure i was still a tear in god’s eye when you entered your first year of college.”

“i think you’re perfect.”

“then your standards are too low. i’m not aiming for perfection but if i were you don’t know enough about me to know what holds the cracks together.”

dead eye silent stare

—

gtfoh.

if you want sex just say you want sex and could give a rats ass about who i am, where i’ve been or where i’ll end up. that way i can gross you out with some made up line about having ten or so sexually transmitted diseases yet would still be happy to oblige as long as you have a health plan and primary care physician.

and they’re always f’n drunk too. dumb ass.